This has been a long tiring week for all of us. It has seen a battle of wills, coughs and colds disrupting sleep, a mother’s heart and mind elsewhere, a 6 year old boy’s complete frustration and unwillingness to engage with anything that resembles a pencil and paper. It has not been a week of highlights and joyous moments. It has been a week when I wondered if I can do this, can I give the children the best, can I provide for them. And by my own strength I cannot.
This week my heart and mind have been pulled, distracted by possible options for our next season, and by comments that felt as if they were undermining all that I am seeking to do to provide a home for my family, for caring for my family and creation. And in it all fear has shouted loudest, taking me away from being present, telling me that there is no point so there is no point in trying. And Bob, Zog and Kanga have felt it keenly.
I need to think again how to teach maths and all things words, how to engage with material in a fun way with the emphasis being on the learning rather than on Bob’s ability to produce written results. I noticed how easy and fun it has been this week as Zog works out numbers and counting but as he is 3 I have no expectation on him and I am only following up on specific learning as and when he seeks it. For Bob though I expect more and we have moved away from more tangible learning and I need to return to that approach now before he gets so frustrated he gets put off. So this weekend I will need to carve out some time to rethink our lessons and provide him with a safe place once again to learn and to love to learn.
This has not been a joyous week but it has given me time to realise what happens when you take your eyes off the children and cruise along giving more thought to outcomes and results. Weeks like this are a blessing if I am willing to pay attention to them and respond. Tonight though is for healing sleep hopefully and tomorrow is a new day in which through the creative wisdom of God, who knows my 3 inside out, I can come up with some new ideas for learning.
Bob may not be keen on pencil and paper right now but projects such as this sphinx will hold him for hours.