Its been a while since I have written a family update. I have sat down a few times to start writing but each time I sit down at the computer the blank screen wins the battle and I walk away again. Ordinary time very much felt like ordinary time with little to write about and even less to read about. Time and energy is absorbed by two little boys, meals, laundry, duplo, sleepless nights, drs appointments, hoovering, reading, changing nappies, preschool, meals, laundry….. Even now in the season of Advent words seem to be on strike. Its been hard to see God at work, even harder to make the effort to look and see what He is doing. Being thankful for the little things has taken any final energy and is quickly run over by worn out selfishness, self doubt and the reality that my heart is no different to that of my three year old. Though I have learnt how to white wash and make accpetable my reactions at least to the outside world if not to my immediate family. Ordinary time has felt empty and insignificant, no sign of the gospel joy I am supposed to have. Its been like wading through mud, one step at a time going nowhere fast, if anywhere at all.
This week saw the start of Advent. We have laid ordinary time aside and the house is being decorated. The old old story of good news is told and retold and retold. Glitter and glue are found in all sorts of places giving the whole house a shimmery glow. Time and energy is still absorbed by two little boys, meals, laundry, duplo, drs appointments, hoovering, reading, changing nappies, preschool, meals, laundry…..but there is something else. Each time I hoover the floor and it sparkles back at me gold, silver, red and green I am reminded of the joy of a small boy sitting at the table making decorations to celebrate Jesus, ‘the one who is taking His time to take us all to God’s house because He only has two hands and so can only take us 2 at a time and who is the only true light of the world as He is the only light with legs and candles cannot walk around and fill the world with light.’ This Advent I am reading God’s word but I am also soaking in my 3 year old’s understanding and excitement of Jesus and letting him teach me about Advent and waiting for the Kingdom come.
And for anyone west of us who celebrates St Nicholas’ Day he may be late, as he has been invited to join us for a pancake breakfast in the morning.